Isolation is growing in my brain again...

Sometimes the words of another can express your feelings and experiences so exact it's like a knife slicing your skin. I had a doctor's appointment today, it didn't go so well. No death sentences or anything. But more doctor's appointments and skepticism. A heart is a delicate thing. It can go through extreme stress, bad diet, disease and survive. But the slightest thing can break it.

If you only knew.

These are the words to an awesome song from a band that tugs my heartstrings. The song is called Weightless by the band Floater... and if you know anything at all about me, you know how special they are to me.

When you were young, burning under the covers,
And hundreds of lovers were trailing out behind you
Time will move just as you pull it, quicker than a bullet
You know it's gonna to remind you

How your heart, so sticky sweet, is waiting to attack
You play the hand you're given
Even though the deck is stacked
Until you're ready for the next one, yeah

And then a wise man taught you a lesson
While you were confessing, staring at the fire
"Take your time because as long as you're living
It's all that you're given, you are a slave to desire."

You said "oh sun come out today",
It said "I will not shine."
You begged the moon to light your way,
It said "I must decline, because the fall makes you break.
But the breaking makes you see that only the light gives you shape In the darkness you stay shapeless

Only love gives you weight
Only love can keep you waiting
Only love makes you weightless"

All this time you have been aching for someone to trust
Filling all your days with taking and doing all the things you must
Gravity is slowly breaking down your will
Don't hold it back
Don't hold it back
Don't hold it back

Because the fall makes you break
But the break makes you see that
Only the light gives you shape
In the darkness you stay shapeless

Only love gives you weight
Only love can keep you weighted
Only love

When you were young, burning under the covers
And hundreds of lovers were trailing out behind you
Time will move just as you pull it
Quicker than a bullet
You know it's going to remind

How your heart, so sticky sweet, is waiting to attack
You play the hand you're given
Even though the deck is stacked
Until you're ready for the next one, yeah
yeah..

It's looking so good...

Hope

If not, I hope that the right decisions get made. I'm sending ALL of my good karma Obama's way.

bbbaahhhhhh

Rainy day

I love rainy days :) I absolutely love the smell and that foreboding feeling it gives the air. The soothing sound it makes on the ground like memories from my childhood. Maybe my kids will like rain as much as I do. It makes colors come out of nowhere, and cleanses my lungs. It's even better in the mountains with the fog and earthen heaviness.